 | You sat at the same desk for 4 years and
worked for three different companies. |
| Your company welcome sign is attached with
Velcro. |
| Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket. |
| Your company logo on your badge is applied
with stick-um. |
| When someone asks about what you do for a
living, you lie. |
| You learn about your layoff on CNN. |
| Your biggest loss from a system crash is that
you lose your best jokes. |
| Your supervisor hasn't the ability to do your
job assignment. |
| You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom
closet. |
| Salaries of the members on the Executive Board
are higher than all the Third World countries' annual budgets combined. |
| Your home phone has none of the features you
developed cuz you're never there. |
| It's dark when you drive to and from work. |
| Fun is when issues are assigned to someone
else. |
| Communication is something your group is
having problems with. |
| You see a good looking person and know it is a
visitor. |
| A tie is hanging in your cube. |
| Free food left over from meetings is your main
staple. |
| Weekends are those days your spouse makes you
stay home. |
| Being sick is defined as can't walk or you're
in the hospital. |
| You work 200 hours for the $100 bonus check
and jubilantly say "Oh wow, thanks!" |
| All real work gets started after 5pm or on
weekends. |
| Everyone fights fires (i.e. problems). |
| Dilbert cartoons hang outside every cube. |
| Plants in your cube are healthier than your
plants at home. |
| Your boss' favorite lines are "when you
get a few minutes," "in your spare time," "when you're
freed up," and "I have an opportunity for you." |
| 10% of the people you work with - no one (boss
included) knows what they do. |
| Vacation is something you rollover to next
year or a check you get every January. |
| Your relatives and family describe your job as
"works with computers" or "does something with
telephones" |
| Change is the norm. |
| Nepotism is encouraged. |
| You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting. |
| You read this entire list and understood it. |
